How Important is Character Development?

Self-awareness: “The conscious knowledge of one’s own character, feelings, motives, and desires.” At least that’s what comes up when you Google “self-awareness.” At what age do we begin to develop self-awareness? For me, this was some time after age 8. When you’re young, parents don’t burden you with as many things as they do when you get older. However, I noticed that some parents don't care for the way in which their child’s personality is developing. Some never stressed the importance of becoming a good samaritan or just an overall “good” person. This was the case for my parents, which is why I didn’t understand how some of my actions in the past might have been harmful to others. One specific incident that occurred is something that happened when I was in second grade.

My elementary school had a talent show every year, and in second grade I had decided to participate and sing a solo. A week before talent show sign-ups were closed, my homeroom teacher announced that one of the girls in my class, named Ashley, wanted to be in the talent show. However, Ashley didn't want to perform by herself so my teacher asked if anyone would let her join their act. I didn’t know Ashley well, and I thought she seemed nice because she was a fairly quiet individual. Unfortunately, many of my classmates didn't share the same idea about her. She wasn't popular or well liked, mainly due to her being a heavier girl. Nonetheless, I decided to let Ashley join me, but for the wrong reasons. It was mainly because I knew she wasn’t as popular, so people wouldn’t pay as much attention to her as they might anybody else. I know, I know, it’s terrible - but I truly didn't think like that at the time! It was when I was reflecting on the whole situation years later that I understood the reasons behind my actions. As bad as this was, it wasn’t the worst part of the incident.

Things were going well for me and Ashley during practice when one day a fellow second grader, named Sierra, had a request for me.

“Can you please let me join your act? We’re one week away from the show and I have nothing to do!” Sierra explained to me.

I froze, unsure of what to tell her. She must have seen the uncertainty on my face.

“Please! I was in a dance group that didn’t work out. Now I want to sing, but I have no idea what to do. Also, I’m scared of going up there alone.”

“I don’t know, Sierra. We’re only a week away, like you said. I just don’t think it’s going to work.”

At the time, I didn’t know why I was so opposed to her joining my act - I just knew I didn’t want her to join me. This was different from Ashley joining me because Sierra was more popular and had a lot of friends. Sierra approached me on multiple occasions, still asking me to join my act but I continued to reject her.

Come the day of the talent show, Sierra sang a difficult song and sang it like a pro. She ended up being the talk of the night and of the following day. Not only did I feel jealous, I also felt bad about not letting her join me.

In the end, I’m not saying that this incident is the direct result of my parents not focusing more on trying to make me a kinder and more selfless person. However, there are other kids that have had parents similar to mine that ended up becoming disrespectful and selfish. Clearly, I didn’t turn out to be any sort of criminal but if I never realized the fault in my behavior I could have continued doing similar acts that could have escalated into more serious altercations over the years. So to all my current and future parents, guardians, and caretakers that are reading this: love your kid for who they are, but also try your hardest to raise them into people that you will be proud to call your child because of their amazing character.